HEART OF THE WEST

by O. HENRY


CONTENTS

I.   Hearts and Crosses
II.   The Ransom of Mack
III.   Telemachus, Friend
IV.   The Handbook of Hymen
V.   The Pimienta Pancakes
VI.   Seats of the Haughty
VII.   Hygeia at the Solito
VIII.   An Afternoon Miracle
IX.   The Higher Abdication
X.   Cupid à la Carte
XI.   The Caballero's Way
XII.   The Sphinx Apple
XIII.   The Missing Chord
XIV.   A Call Loan
XV.   The Princess and the Puma
XVI.   The Indian Summer of Dry Valley Johnson
XVII.   Christmas by Injunction
XVIII.  A Chaparral Prince
XIX.   The Reformation of Calliope

I
HEARTS AND CROSSES

Baldy Woods reached for the bottle, and got it. Whenever Baldy wentfor anything he usually—but this is not Baldy's story. He poured out athird drink that was larger by a finger than the first and second.Baldy was in consultation; and the consultee is worthy of his hire.

"I'd be king if I was you," said Baldy, so positively that hisholster creaked and his spurs rattled.

Webb Yeager pushed back his flat-brimmed Stetson, and made furtherdisorder in his straw-coloured hair. The tonsorial recourse beingwithout avail, he followed the liquid example of the more resourcefulBaldy.

"If a man marries a queen, it oughtn't to make him a two-spot,"declared Webb, epitomising his grievances.

"Sure not," said Baldy, sympathetic, still thirsty, and genuinelysolicitous concerning the relative value of the cards. "By rightsyou're a king. If I was you, I'd call for a new deal. The cards havebeen stacked on you—I'll tell you what you are, Webb Yeager."

"What?" asked Webb, with a hopeful look in his pale-blue eyes.

"You're a prince-consort."

"Go easy," said Webb. "I never blackguarded you none."

"It's a title," explained Baldy, "up among the picture-cards; but itdon't take no tricks. I'll tell you, Webb. It's a brand they're got forcertain animals in Europe. Say that you or me or one of them Dutchdukes marries in a royal family. Well, by and by

...

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