A PREFECT'S UNCLE

By P. G. Wodehouse

1903




DEDICATION

TO W. TOWNEND






CONTENTS

1 — TERM BEGINS
2 — INTRODUCES AN UNUSUAL UNCLE
3 — THE UNCLE MAKES HIMSELF AT HOME
4 — PRINGLE MAKES A SPORTING OFFER
5 — FARNIE GETS INTO TROUBLE—
6 — —AND STAYS THERE
7 — THE BISHOP GOES FOR A RIDE
8 — THE M.C.C. MATCH
9 — THE BISHOP FINISHES HIS RIDE
10 — IN WHICH A CASE IS FULLY DISCUSSED
11 — POETRY AND STUMP-CRICKET
12 — 'WE, THE UNDERSIGNED—'
13 — LEICESTER'S HOUSE TEAM GOES INTO A SECOND EDITION
14 — NORRIS TAKES A SHORT HOLIDAY
15 — VERSUS CHARCHESTER (AT CHARCHESTER)
16 — A DISPUTED AUTHORSHIP
17 — THE WINTER TERM
18 — THE BISHOP SCORES








1 — TERM BEGINS

Marriott walked into the senior day-room, and, finding no one there, hurled his portmanteau down on the table with a bang. The noise brought William into the room. William was attached to Leicester's House, Beckford College, as a mixture of butler and bootboy. He carried a pail of water in his hand. He had been engaged in cleaning up the House against the conclusion of the summer holidays, of which this was the last evening, by the simple process of transferring all dust, dirt, and other foreign substances from the floor to his own person.

''Ullo, Mr Marriott,' he said.

'Hullo, William,' said Marriott. 'How are you? Still jogging along? That's a mercy. I say, look here, I want a quiet word in season with the authorities. They must have known I was coming back this evening. Of course they did. Why, they specially wrote and asked me. Well, where's the red carpet? Where's the awning? Where's the brass band that ought to have met me at the station? Where's anything? I tell you what it is, William, my old companion, there's a bad time coming for the Headmaster if he doesn't mind what he's doing. He must learn that life is stern and life is earnest, William. Has

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